I did it!
Not just one “it” but so many “its”!
- I took my first flight alone
- This was my first business trip
- I didn’t eat at a single restaurant (including the Philly pretzels that they had delivered to the office yesterday)
- I killed it in the training sessions
- I didn’t check any luggage (yes, I know I was only gone for two days, but you should seriously see how much stuff I “need” for two days…it’s really absurd)
I’m a grown up now!
I was seriously born for this world, I just know it. I’m sitting here in the Philly airport with three hours until my flight starts boarding and I can’t wipe this goofy grin off my face. There are very few times in my life (that didn’t involve my husband) that made me happier than this moment. Sitting here in an airport terminal, returning from a business trip where I got to train people (one of my favorite things to do!), writing a post on a blog that has chronicled one of the best years of my life is an absolute dream come true.
I almost didn’t come on this trip.
When Cliff took me to the airport Tuesday afternoon, it took everything I had not to go into a full blown panic attack. It wasn’t the flight that I was scared of (although, I admit that I was a little nervous) it was the fear of making a complete fool out of myself in front of the “big wigs.” What if I sounded like an idiot? What if they took one look at my training documents and started laughing? What if I fell flat on my face, in the middle of the street, crossing the four lane from the car rental facility to the airport for my return flight? (Yes, that last one happened)
My heart started pounding, I was dizzy, and I shook all the way to my terminal.
I won’t tell you about silently sobbing until the plane was in the air.
I even went so far as to tell him that I had changed my mind and I didn’t want to go. Obviously, being the amazing person that he is, he didn’t let that happen. Instead, he told me for the millionth time that he knew I could do this. Then he hugged me, kissed me, and shoved my ass onto the escalator.
Ok, that’s a little dramatic, he didn’t’ shove me, but he mentally forced me up the escalator.
I’m very fortunate to have been able to marry my best friend who knows just how to get me to put my big girl panties on and do what needs to be done no matter how terrified I am. “I can’t” just isn’t in his vocabulary and I feel like I am very, very close to removing it from my own.
So, thanks Clifford, because I am so, so, so very happy that I went through with it.
I’ve never had more faith in myself than right at this moment. I’ve lost almost 160 pounds, I finally have a college degree, and I have a job where my work ethic is really starting to pay off. Instead of dwelling on how long it took to get here, I’m starting to truly enjoy the place I’m in.
Ok, enough sappy crap. There were some pretty terrible things that happened on the trip.
No Philly cheesesteak.
No long run (I’ll see you again Valley Forge!)
This is the closest I got to downtown.
I picked the wrong week to swear off coffee forever.